Trump’s Dishwasher Rant Is Highlight Of Rambling Pre-Debate Rally

, , 100 Comments


WHILE THE DEMOCRATS DEBATED IN
IOWA, TRUMP TRIED TO STEAL THE LIMELIGHT BY HOLDING A “KEEP
AMERICA GREAT” RALLY UP IN MILWAUKEE. TRUMP KICKED THINGS OFF WITH A
MOVE FROM SPEECHWRITING 101.>>AND YOUR GREAT GREEN BAY
PACKERS ARE PLAYING SAN FRANCISCO THIS WEEKEND.( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
GOOD LUCK. SO, DO WE HAVE ANY GREEN BAY
PACKER FANS HERE TONIGHT?>>Stephen: YOU CAN’T ASK A
CROWD IN MILWAUKEE IF THEY ARE GREEN BAY PACKER FANS. THAT IS THE CHEAPEST PLOY FOR
APPLAUSE. MY AUDIENCE WOULD NEVER FALL FOR IT, BECAUSE
THEY’RE THE SMARTEST, MOST BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE IN THE WORLD,
AM I RIGHT?! OH, YEAH! (CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)
TRUMP BRAGGED ABOUT KILLING SOLEIMANI, AND HAD HIGH, IF
STRANGE, PRAISE FOR OUR MILITARY.>>THESE GUYS WERE BETTER THAN
TOM CRUISE AT HIS BEST.>>Stephen: (AS TRUMP)
“BETTER AT FLYING JETS THAN TOM CRUISE IN ‘TOP GUN.’
BETTER AT MAKING COCKTAILS THAN TOM CRUISE IN ‘COCKTAIL.’
BETTER– BETTER AT RAINING MEN THAN TOM CRUISE IN ‘RAIN MAN.'”
“BETTER AT INTERVIEWING VAMPIRES THAN…” THEN TRUMP DUG INTO SPECIFICS
LIKE “WHEN IS NOW?”>>AND IS THERE EVER, EVER A
BETTER PLACE TO BE THAN A TRUMP RALLY ON SOME NIGHT DURING SOME
WEEK?( LAUGHTER )
>>Stephen: HE REALLY HAS NO IDEA WHAT DAY IT IS.( LAUGHTER )
(AS TRUMP) “I’LL NEVER FORGET THE WONDERFUL
NIGHT AND/OR DAY WE’RE HAVING HERE IN UNNAMED SCREAMING PLACE,
U.S.A.” GO, UNNAMED TEAM!”
THEN, THE PRESIDENT RAMBLED ON ABOUT STUFF HE LIKED.>>YOU KNOW, I LIKE GOLF, AND I
LOVE MY GRANDCHILDREN. I DON’T THINK I COULD TALK TO
SOMEBODY ABOUT THEM FOR 45 MINUTES THAT I DON’T EVEN KNOW. I HAVE A BEAUTIFUL GRANDCHILD,
HE IS REALLY BEAUTIFUL, HE IS SO GREAT. OKAY, WHAT ELSE AM I GOING TO
SAY? RIGHT?>>Stephen: (AS TRUMP)
“I LOVE MY GRANDCHILDREN, WHO DEFINITELY HAVE NAMES, WHICH I
KNOW, AND WHO WERE BORN ON SOME NIGHT DURING SOME WEEK, SOME
PLACE.”( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
>>Jon: OVER-THE-RAINBOW.>>Stephen: TRUMP SPECULATED ON
HOW THE WORLD WOULD BE DIFFERENT IF A DEMOCRAT HAD BEEN ELECTED
IN 2016.>>YOU WOULDN’T HAVE BOUGHT ALL
THOSE BRAND-NEW “KEEP AMERICA GREAT” HATS.>>Stephen: HE’S RIGHT. NO, NO, THAT CHECKS OUT. YES, WE HAVE PAID A PRICE:
AMERICA’S LOSS OF STANDING IN THE WORLD, THE DESTRUCTION OF
OUR CONSTITUTIONAL NORMS, MASSIVE AND FLAGRANT
CORRUPTION… BUT HATS.( LAUGHTER )
THEN TRUMP LAUNCHED INTO HIS FAVORITE TOPIC: HOUSEHOLD
APPLIANCES.>>I BROUGHT BACK THE OLD LIGHT
BULB.>>Stephen: NOTHING– NOTHING
MAKES YOU SOUND LIKE AN OLD MAN MORE THAN SCREAMING “I BROUGHT
BACK THE OLD LIGHT BULB! IT WAS IN THE GARAGE. IT WAS IN THE GARAGE BY THE
THING WITH THE BOX WITH THE PINE CONES AND LAST YEAR’S TINSEL! HEY, CLOSE THAT DOOR! I’M NOT PAYING TO AIR CONDITION
THE NEIGHBORHOOD HERE!” TRUMP WASN’T AFRAID TO TALK
ABOUT THE HOTBUTTON ISSUES– LIKE DISHWASHER EFFICIENCY.>>I’M ALSO APPROVING NEW
DISHWASHERS THAT GIVE YOU MORE WATER SO YOU CAN ACTUALLY WASH
AND RINSE YOUR DISHES WITHOUT HAVING TO DO IT TEN TIMES. FOUR, FIVE, SIX, SEVEN, EIGHT,
NINE, 10!>>Stephen: FIRST OF ALL, WE
CANNOT LET THIS GUY BECOME PRESIDENT. SECOND–
( LAUGHTER )
( APPLAUSE )
THAT JUST CAN’T HAPPEN.>>Jon: NO! NOT AT ALL!>>Stephen: JUST CAN’T. SECOND, NOBODY DOES THAT. NOW THIS IS– IT’S ALL MADE UP. AND, THIRD, I’M GOING TO SAY, WE
SHOULD NOT TAKE DISHWASHER ADVICE FROM A MAN WHO EATS EVERY
MEAL OUT OF A CARDBOARD BUCKET. IN THE END–
( APPLAUSE )
IN THE END– CARDBOARD BUCKET! IN THE END, TRUMP GOT REALLY
UPSET WITH THE MEDIA FOR… REPORTING THINGS.>>ANYTHING I SAY THAT’S EVEN
SLIGHTLY FALSE, IT’S HEADLINES. “TRUMP SAID THIS”– THESE
PEOPLE, “HE SAID THIS.”>>Stephen: (AS TRUMP)
“EVERY TIME I LIE, THE MEDIA’S LIKE ‘THAT’S A LIE!’
I’M LIKE, ‘NO LIE.’ WHY CAN’T YOU LIE ABOUT MY
LIES? THESE PEOPLE, WITH THE EARS AND
THE FINGERS.”( LAUGHTER )
THE DEBATE AND TRUMP’S SPEECH WEREN’T THE ONLY NEWS TODAY. BECAUSE WE’RE ALSO AT THE
BRINK OF THE PRESIDENT’S IMPEACHMENT TRIAL IN THE SENATE. I’LL TELL YOU ALL ABOUT IT IN
TONIGHT’S EDITION OF “DON AND THE GIANT IMPEACH.”>>TELL ME WHAT I DID, PLEASE! LAUZ
>>Stephen: WHEN LAST WE MET, THERE WAS A STANDOFF PITTING
HOUSE SPEAKER NANCY PELOSI AGAINST SENATE MAJORITY LEADER
AND GOOGLEY EYES GLUED ON AN UNCOOKED CHICKEN THIGH, MITCH
McCONNELL. McCONNELL OPPOSES HAVING
WITNESSES IN TRUMP’S SENATE IMPEACHMENT TRIAL, AND IN
RESPONSE, PELOSI REFUSED TO SEND OVER THE ARTICLES OF
IMPEACHMENT. BUT NOW SHE’S READY TO MOVE
AHEAD, AFTER POINTING OUT ONE INESCAPABLE TRUTH:
>>THIS PRESIDENT IS IMPEACHED FOR LIFE, REGARDLESS OF ANY
GAMESMANSHIP ON THE PART OF MITCH McCONNELL. THERE IS NOTHING THE SENATE CAN
DO THAT CAN EVER ERASE THAT.>>Stephen: (AS TRUMP)
“I CAN’T ERASE IT, BUT IF I USE MY MAGIC MARKER I CAN CHANGE IT
TO THE ‘FARTICLES OF IMPOOP-MENT.’
( LAUGHTER )
LEGACY SECURE, NANCE.”( LAUGHTER )
HIGH-BROW JOKES!( APPLAUSE )
I LOVE IT. COME ON! ON, MARK YOUR CALENDARS, BECAUSE
TODAY MITCH McCONNELL ANNOUNCED THE IMPEACHMENT TRIAL WILL START
NEXT TUESDAY. TO WHICH THE PRESIDENT
RESPONDED: (AS TRUMP)
“I’M SORRY, MITCH, THAT DOESN’T WORK FOR ME. I HAVE SOMETHING ON TUESDAY, IT
SAYS HERE: TACO.” WE’LL BE RIGHT BACK.

 

100 Responses

  1. Johanna Fath-Koziol

    January 16, 2020 10:03 am

    LOL  Drumpf knowing anything about washing dishes??  Knowing anything how a dishwasher even looks like?
    Damn, that´s a good joke.

    Reply
  2. British Comedy Bronco Rothschild Triple Agent

    January 16, 2020 10:08 am

    Yes, The United States was a thing called democracy!? Now, the USA is a NAZI REGIME WITH A 24/7 Police State. IE FBI OVERSEEN FUSION CENTER’s 24/7 are undercover SECRET POLICE who hack into innocent Awake Americans lives to drive them to suicide or have them institutionalized by way of thousands of entrapment schemes.

    Reply
  3. Mark S.

    January 16, 2020 11:14 am

    Trump 2020 too bad another 4 years of economic growth , get over it and invest in your country now , you should of 3 years ago ,.

    Reply
  4. WildwoodClaire1

    January 16, 2020 11:21 am

    I don't think I've ever listened to a man so opposed to new technologies and emerging industries. It's like he thinks he can freeze dry the economy and nothing will ever change.

    Reply
  5. DamnItHeadEd

    January 16, 2020 11:45 am

    I live in riverwest right close to downtown MKE where the Trump spoke. I’d bet most of his supporters from out in the cuts hadn’t seen a black person before attending that rally the other night. Just sayin’.

    Reply
  6. Chris Robinson

    January 16, 2020 11:46 am

    I would love to see part of Trump's trial at The Hague involve him placed in front of a dishwasher and a washing machine, and ask him to identify the dishwasher.

    Reply
  7. Sapanga Apuqahe

    January 16, 2020 12:48 pm

    Stephen Colbert, I suggest you sit down when you want to take a pee. Be a man, son. Worship President Trump or else you will never learn to pee standing up!

    Reply
  8. CM M

    January 16, 2020 12:55 pm

    This   corrupt  fool   is  totally out of it …but then  he  never  was in  . He is  a  total nut case  and  should  not  be  president  of a 'once  great  country'  but is  no  longer!! This  directly caused  by Trump  and  his  very  corrupt  Repugnant-cans. The country  has  shown the  world the  Americans  can  be  very  stupid  and  suckers  for a good  con  and  this  was  the  biggest  one  ever.

    Reply
  9. chooey choco

    January 16, 2020 12:56 pm

    Why not this host run for a seat and prove his self proclaimed being smart. Hes obviously bragging that he is smart and maybe perfect

    Reply
  10. Philip Cosgrove

    January 16, 2020 1:52 pm

    COLBERT, YOU'RE LOOKING OLDER BY THE DAY. YOU GOT SOMETHING TO HIDE????? YOU ARE ALL GOING TO JAIL

    Reply
  11. tubularAp

    January 16, 2020 2:34 pm

    Two braincells run into each other inside an empty skull. Says one braincell to the other: "Did you know that everytime we meet the president of the most powerful country on the only planet where life has evolved in the universe thinks he has a thought ?"

    Reply
  12. Yusuf Ibrahim

    January 16, 2020 2:56 pm

    Proof the american electorate is DAF. As Obi Wun Kenobi said, "Who's the fool? The fool or the fool who follows the fool?" Trump rally equals a stadium full of fools.
    Please people get ur neighbors or friends or coworkers to vote. WE CAN'T HAVE ANOTHER 4YRS OF THIS!!!!!!!

    Reply
  13. Deep hug

    January 16, 2020 3:17 pm

    I question the intelligence of anyone who can listen to every word that comes out of the orange racist's mouth/still applaud.

    Reply
  14. G Payne

    January 16, 2020 3:19 pm

    just looking out at the people there in the rally, clearly deplorable…trump is this the best you can do?

    Reply
  15. Jess Witherspoon

    January 16, 2020 4:41 pm

    wtf why don't these people think it's weird that the president is talking to them about dishwashers?

    Reply
  16. Lesley2018 Sullivan

    January 16, 2020 5:34 pm

    This video was funny, but what Trump was saying is true. The EPA has gotten involved in limiting how much water is allowed to be used for washers, dishwashers, and toilets. People are having to run their appliances multiple times to not only clean the items but also to remove any residual soap due to lack of water. And toilets are clogging more because of this as well. You can call it funny bathroom humor, but I encourage you to take a look at your water bill if you're having to double flush. Another point to the toilets is that with less water being used you are taking a huge risk of your sewer line on your property getting clogged because of the lack of water that moves all waste products out of your house to your city's treatments center. Waste can include your toilet but also your garbage disposal as well. If your toilets aren't working at the appropriate or sanitary level of removing waste from your home, it can get clogged and back up into your sinks all throughout the house depending on your pipes and how your house was built. It is funny to talk about appliances in a national arena, but its being talked about because over regulating an industry directly impacts the consumer and what monies they spend. Just ask a plumber or the person installing your appliances. They will tell you straight up the problems they see on a daily basis with energy efficiency items, because they're the ones repairing them. Plumbers are making really good money because of this industry change. So not only is the consumer paying more for energy efficient items but then winds up spending more money later on to either repair the item or buy another new item at a much quicker rate than before the over regulation took place.

    Reply
  17. Durox Kilo

    January 16, 2020 6:08 pm

    I CAN'T believe it!!! the outro is at a lower volume than the segment… is this even real? am I tripping again?

    Reply
  18. discipleofsakura

    January 16, 2020 6:33 pm

    Unnamed sources are claiming that some of Trump's grandchildren, specifically those of Ivanka and Jared, are actually also his children.

    Reply
  19. Alice Milling

    January 16, 2020 6:53 pm

    Honestly tell me how many people would let trump babysit their children,he dont strike me as someone who genuinely even likes his own children

    Reply
  20. Sharon Donovan

    January 16, 2020 6:57 pm

    hi steven GOOD TO SEE YOU EVERY NIGHT YOU MAKE ME LAUGH WATCHING YOUR SHOW…….TRUMP NEEDS MENTAL HELP LOOK HOW ……..CRAZY…… DISHWASHER…..CRAZY…..I PRAY TO GOD HE IS OUT OF WASHINGTON SOON…..GET RID OF HIM…… NEEDS TO BE FIRED AND THEN PUT IN A MENTAL HOSPITAL THEN PUT IN PRISON…….THANKS STEVEN FOR ALL THE LAUGHS

    Reply
  21. putzthewondersloth

    January 16, 2020 7:16 pm

    Trump loves his grandchildren, but his job just keeps getting in the way. I think we should do him a favor and write our senators so that they can give him more free time.

    Reply
  22. Carol Shehan

    January 16, 2020 7:20 pm

    It's not made up you idiot! Unless you're rich, your dishwasher doesn't put much water out. I'm sure his puts enough out because he wouldn't know if it did or not. Idiot.

    Reply
  23. kensaiix

    January 16, 2020 7:22 pm

    0:45 NO! NO CHEERING !!! what is wrong with this crowd, that was ironic, they were supposed to NOT fall for it.

    man….. ppl these days….

    Reply
  24. modernorpheus

    January 16, 2020 8:19 pm

    "Yes, we have paid a price: America's loss of standing in the world, the destruction of our constitutional norms, massive and flagrant corruption, but…

    hats!"

    Reply
  25. violetsnotviolence

    January 16, 2020 8:38 pm

    Is anybody going to tell Trump that Cruise is an actor and that Top Gun was not a documentary?

    Reply
  26. Christopher Donnelly

    January 16, 2020 8:45 pm

    Americans are the very least educated, English speaking people on Earth…Just a bunch of money grubbing fish.

    Reply
  27. Christopher Donnelly

    January 16, 2020 8:47 pm

    Even those who do not like The USA, are laughing at stupid, fat, brain-dead, little Americans! A shame, they might have been good. lol

    Reply
  28. Kimberley Morton

    January 16, 2020 8:52 pm

    "I love my grandchild. What else can I say about it?"

    Clearly either he knows nothing about his grandchildren or doesn't see his own family as human beings.
    There are members of my family I haven't seen or spoken to in over a year but I could fill an hour talking about them, easily.

    Reply
  29. Ask to seduce Miss

    January 16, 2020 9:12 pm

    He is honestly such a delusional person. American politics has become an absolute joke on the world stage not just because of him but it has really been exposed by him.

    Reply
  30. Alexander Milentis

    January 16, 2020 9:39 pm

    I'm bookmarking all of these videos for when Trump is acquitted. It will be just as funny as when Colbert cried after Trump winning the election!

    Reply
  31. Mullet Man

    January 16, 2020 10:03 pm

    If it wasn't for Russia hacking our polls he would not be in office his ass would still be buying std filled prostitutes and complaining about the air is too fresh to breathe

    Reply
  32. Tazz Major

    January 16, 2020 11:11 pm

    Im really beginning to think they really dont pay attention to what he says or does all that matters is there is a republican in office. and the man in the tan suit is gone

    Reply
  33. Emily White

    January 16, 2020 11:30 pm

    Wait, Trum is aware that half of what he said is bs? Mind Blown and no, don't ask Trump on washing dishes… he's never done so.

    Reply
  34. Melanie Cribbs

    January 16, 2020 11:53 pm

    I really wish that every city trump owes money to for his rallies would not let him come back or even to the state. He is currently in hock to three or four cities in Wisconsin. Pay those bills and maybe we'll let you come back.

    Reply
  35. Donna Chatterton

    January 17, 2020 12:05 am

    Those people were paid to clap and support the idiot. None of them could afford their shirts and hats. Was that a further incentive to make fools of themselves.

    Reply
  36. C Smith

    January 17, 2020 1:10 am

    EMBARRASSING to see so many Human beings, actually cheering for such ridiculous Statements….Reminds me of the Emperor's Clothes Story…..

    Reply
  37. mytexas days

    January 17, 2020 2:30 am

    I cannot watch another year of your Trump impersonation. Please STOP DOING THAT. Nor can I tolerate another year of Trump's speeches at rallies. I find both annoying.

    Reply
  38. ღSwnsasyღ _

    January 17, 2020 3:16 am

    Please PLEASE PLEASE! EVEN $5 IS MASSIVE!! I'm dying at age 42.. I'm sorry, it's an embarrassment but I don't have a choice.. I have 3 kids.. Please just read what I'm going through before you say no or click past!! In God's Name I'm BEGGING because I'm so so scared … I HAVE INSURANCE TOO!!!!

    https://www.gofundme.com/f/dyingwthcureavail?utm_medium=copy_link&utm_source=customer&utm_campaign=p_na+share-sheet&rcid=8338bb48dcfb4024b0e78b4b7320bf4d

    Reply
  39. Kathleen McKenzie

    January 17, 2020 4:37 am

    And my fellow Wisconsinites are cheering like crazy over improved dishwashers? Lordy, I am so glad I am now a transplanted California liberal!

    Reply
  40. Be Yourself

    January 17, 2020 4:38 am

    What kind of a president who talks about dishwasher? I can't believe it that a president talks about dish washer and toilet flush! 😂😂😂😂😂 A clear low level of manners, knowledge, character, personality & he's a shit 😂😂😂

    P.S./ The dishwasher was needed in that rally to clean the heads of the people who attended.

    Reply
  41. Professor Liberal Avenger

    January 17, 2020 4:47 am

    Washing his dishes 10 times? Perseveration (needlessly repeating behaviors, over and over and over……..) is a sign of mental illness.

    Reply

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